Straight as a Cucumber by Ana Byrde

There’s a couple of reasons I shouldn’t crush on Zach Stauff.
1) He’s my big brother’s best friend.
2) He’s my roommate.
3) He’s straight.
None of those things matter when I’m around him and my heart starts beating like crazy. He’s been the star of my wet dreams since forever, but to him I’m just the kid who used to eat mudcakes. That is, until he walks in on me playing with a cucumber–without my clothes on. Worse, I was on camera streaming to an online audience when he witnessed the ‘cucumber incident.’

Now he’s probably got a very different image of me.
My subscribers say we should make out. They say they’d pay good money for the show.
I can’t ask Zach to do that.
But what if this is my best chance to touch something that isn’t a vegetable?