What I’ve Tasted of Desire by Chance Christopher

My dearest Alex,

Did you think that it was over? That, when the fire came, all your deepest nightmares came to a head and blew away like smoke on the breeze? Think again, lover.
Remember that I know you like nobody else knows you. I see you in a way that you can’t even see yourself. I am your shadow on the street; I’m the stray light that catches your eye when you turn your head just-so under the glare of the morning sunlight. I’m with you when you eat, sleep, bathe, laugh, or cry. (You need to stop crying, Alex. I’m going to change all that; don’t you worry.)
I wish you could envision the life we’re going to have together. Where I’m taking you, there will be no more city filth or soul-sucking intruders in our love story. You don’t need any of them, my beautiful boy. You don’t need family or friends. Especially not Tom — you definitely don’t need him.
This time around, Alex, I am telling my story. I won’t be misunderstood any longer. If they all understand the pureness of my love and what I was willing to do to make you mine, maybe they would stop vilifying me. I’m not the bad guy, after all. I may have killed, but who wouldn’t end a life to build the life of their dreams with the most perfect angel that God ever created? I may have committed unspeakable violations, but every heinous act I did was to get closer to you. To keep you safe. I would do anything for you. Lie, steal, cheat … I would die a thousand deaths to see you smile.
After all, what’s love without a little pain?

Eternally yours,
X