Unclench Me Softly by Gwendoline Rose

A spiritually chaotic, accidentally sexy Reverse Harem romantic comedy with rituals, robes, and more emotional healing than I legally intended.

Hi. I’m Bliss.
Yes, that’s my real name.
No, I don’t want to talk about it.
Here’s what you need to know:
I inherited a crumbling “spiritual wellness retreat” in the woods.
It came with back taxes, a clamshell-shaped steam dome, and a vulva pond.
To save it from demolition, I launched a fake men’s retreat called The Five Pillars of Divine Masculine Surrender™.
Then five emotionally constipated, spiritually smoldering men actually signed up.
And showed up.
With abs.
Now I’m running group howling circles, designing bullshit rituals on the fly, and trying not to spiritually marry all five of them just because they finally unclenched during Rage Yoga and learned how to hold space.
It was supposed to be a scam.
It might be a cult now.
And I might be in love with every single man here.
Including the one who’s probably investigating me. And the one who blindfolded me with my own robe belt and called it emotional realignment. And the one who brings snacks.
It’s fine.
Everything is fine.
We have a bonfire ceremony planned. There’s a newsletter. We’re soft now.