Proud Daddy’s Lonely Little by Alice Newgate

She was, by her own admission, a nightmare. A girl ‘out of time’ and a girl who had no idea where she was going. She wanted a man, an older man, but she was a walking disaster-on-legs. Cats died around her, batteries suddenly exploded at the most inappropriate moments, beer soaked the floor at any bar she was standing at…and she ate men’s chickens!
He was normal. Rich, successful, but normal. Compared to her anyway, but then the clowns at the circus would appear normal if stood alongside her. He wasn’t good looking though. He was kind and he was generous, and he wanted a younger girl. How could that happen? He had a plan, and it came to fruition, but in the most bizarre and unexpected way.

Kirsten
I hadn’t dated for so long that I honestly started to believe that I was in love with a piece of plastic. I wanted an older man, but they just looked at me and turned away…no matter what I did for them! I smiled, I pouted, I laughed, and I lied. Nothing worked. Then I lied again, this time on a website, and it worked! I got him. I got my older man. Okay, it wasn’t the man that I’d chased originally, because he didn’t exist…see? It’s never easy, but now I’ve got him, I’ll make sure he stays!

Ryan
I wasn’t supposed to meet her. I actually hadn’t taken any notice of her, but then once she came into my life like a hurricane, it was impossible not to be with her. She was the clumsiest, craziest, quirkiest and most unusual person I’ve ever met…and I fell in love with her. It was supposed to be someone else, but she didn’t exist! Anyway, now she’s mine, and I don’t care what she is. I’ll keep her forever!