No Prince for Riley by Anna Katmore

No Prince for Riley
or
When Red Riding Hood decided to catch herself a royal.
Every time someone opens a storybook and reads the four magical words “Once upon a time,” my granny gets eaten a few hours later. Boy, it sucks! I wish my tale had a cool ending, like Cindy and Briar-Rose got. Along with a castle and a dashing prince to marry.
Did you ever kiss a frog? No prince pops out of that. Trust me, I’ve tried. Seventeen frogs, and nearly one warty toad—for nothing.
What I get is Jack. Alas, he’s unsuitable for a romantic ending. The Wolf simply lacks the manners for that. And obviously, a crown. Because, off the record: love only happens among royals in Fairyland.
Since royalty doesn’t just rain from the sky, I’m going to build a prince trap tomorrow, and then I’ll write my new ever after. It’ll be so good…
*cough* Hi, I’m Jack Wolf—yes, if Riley gets to say something here, so do I. ^^
And she better forget about this harebrained idea to elope with a royal. We’re not going to rewrite anything. If she wants to make out with somebody, she can do it with me or no one.
Oh, and…it will be good.